DEAR WILLIAM, DO CAPITALS HELP?

As part of his regular publication, The Pessimist's Guide to Modern Living, William D. Green is preparing to undergo a week-long challenge to stay away from Facebook entirely in order to dispel (or otherwise) the myth that people living in the digital age cannot avoid logging into their favoured social networking site for any long period of time. He believes he could do this challenge for longer if he didn't need it after a week to advertise the publication of the seventh Pessimist's Guide.

In the course of this challenge, in order to make sure he has absolutely no chance at all of even glancing at his Facebook account, each member of The Pessimist Chronicles will be posting their arguments as to why they should be the one to recieve William's password, and then to change it so that he is well and truly locked out. These arguments are being posted, one by one, as articles herein. Here is just one of these arguments, as posed by a very close friend of Mr. Green - our resident 'sexpert', Alex White.

Dearest William/Will/Willy/Greeny/Bubba/any other name I have called you over the past 18 months. I think you should personally trust me with your password. Out of all the members of TPC I personally believe that I would be the obvious choice. So Simon chats all this malarkey, but when it comes down to the crunch (and several Japanese beers) who's more likely to 'frape' you?

Yes.

Just as I thought: Mister Schaman Berkmarrr. I personally would like to do this Facebook disbandment with you, as I feel it could be quite the experience for the both of us. I have been told over the past five years that I'm 'quite the avid Facebooker' so a break from it could prove quite the challenge. I have tried to break up with Facebook many a time in the past, but like a sweet and fair maiden, she has always tempted me back with her 'goods'.

So this is what I'm proposing...

HOW ABOUT WE SWAP USERNAMES AND CHANGE THE PASSWORDS?


It's rather logical if you think about it, as it also eliminates the prospect of a frape. If you wanted to abuse my trust, then I, in theory, could abuse yours.


It's mutually beneficial and we can also compare and contrast our findings.


Sound good?


Cheers Bubba


Alex White

Interesting. Although not sure how I feel about you badmouthing the trustworthiness of my esteemed friend Simon Birkmyre (we all know he's a man of his word), your proposal intrigues me more than that great lovelorn womaniser Orsino intrigued Viola by appearing to have fallen in love with her while she was brilliantly disguised as Cesario. I shall be in touch once this process of advertising yourself hath endeth.