Wednesday, 18 April 2012

The Result

Well, we've had a lot of fun over the last few days trying to finally decide who is the best person to trust with a Facebook password. We've had arguments posted on here, we've hda a poll on our Facebook fan page in which several members voted for themselves and thus made their arguments void (perhaps, I'm not entirely sure of the rules) and we've also had ultimate death-matches in the streets of Winchester, all in order to ultimately decide who is most trustworthy out of everyone writing for The Pessimist Chronicles.

And now the vote is in (voting closed at midday today so if you vote now, your vote will not be counted and you may still be charged):

4) Harriet Baker and Simon Birkmyre: Both made exceptionally good arguments in my opinion. Their ways of wording things (and Harriet's subliminal-messaging-saturated piece of artwork) both made me consider their position very seriously but, unfortunately, they do not seem to have won over the public. Technically, Harriet, you finished last because your vote was from yourself. Tut tut.

3) Alex White: The argument which gave me a lot of confidence and a lot of security - if he frapes me, I frape him: simples! Yet, strangely, this argument did not win over the voting public.

2) Shaun Beale: Well... this argument relied on the 'I'm being honest with you, therefore you must trust me'. But when that honesty comes down to a confession that my account will not be safe in Shaun's hands, then I was obviously never going to accept the argument. As such, despite the popularity of your argument with the voting public, I can only say that your intentions are not honourable and, therefore, you should get well and truly on your bike.

1) Kat Darlington: By far the winner, Kat has won over the hearts of our readers with her image-based argument but, unfortunately, it was a bit too... sinister... for my liking. Therefore, Kat, despite your win, I worry that you have strange intentions with my account which make me uneasy and make me dread the day when I return to Facebook and find I have made several enemies by proclaiming that nobody knows how to properly use memes. Therefore, I'm sorry, Kat, but I have chosen to ignore your argument.

Therefore, based upon what I have said herein, the outright winner with the most votes who didn't make me fear irrationally for the safety of my identity is... Alex White.

We will now be logging off from Facebook for seven days, dear readers.

Ciao!

And as for the other Chroniclers who didn't win, still know how much I love you all.

William D. Green.

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